iShailee

“Let each child enjoy the gift of life that god has bestowed on him. ” Childhood is precious and important from the point of view of overall growth and development of the child in the years to come. If a child is happy and contended during his early days the same sense of fulfillment is likely to continue as he grows. Contentment and happiness in early years will make him into a caring person who loves to share his emotions, joys, sorrows, gifts, belongings and more so his time with others. He looks for happiness of others. He learns the joy of giving. Giving for the sake of others happiness. He learns to derive his happiness from a smile on others face.

A child maybe allowed to grow at his own pace undisturbed with too much of early teaching and preaching, at-least till the age of 5 years, there are so many familiar faces to care, indulge and pamper the child that even a child from the poorest family feels like a prince charming. This emotional contentment even in abject poverty, where a child may live on torn clothes, sometimes even without them, eats a staple diet, mostly plays and sleeps under open sky unmindful of the dust or insects surrounding him. But this child is happy .

He values and cherishes even small and inexpensive gifts. He learns to play and share happiness with a torn ball and  make  a bat out of a broken stick. He lives life as it is. He shows small tantrums at times, but is easy to be satisfied. He explores the world around him and seeks knowledge by seeing, hearing and doing. He seldom falls ill.

But a child from a well-to-do family, where again both the parents are working is either left under the care of the maid or is sent to a nearby crèche. It is an experience by itself seeing the separation of the child from the mother when being dropped at the crèche. The tears tell about the fears of the child. No amount of toys, chocolates and other eatables tend to attract him. Even if he becomes quiet, his eyes are always looking for someone missing. Smile comes to his face with great effort and is wiped off soon. The child tends to develop a feeling of deprivation; in an environment of plenty. He tends to become possessive. There is an inherent fear in his mind that what he likes most may not remain with him all the time; like his parents. He develops distrust when each day’s promise of separating him is broken. The child feels cheated. He learns to distrust, he learns to cheat, he learns to break promises, he learns to hoard, not to give and above all he learns that happiness is short lived, so live to the hilt now. He becomes selfish and sick.

The above examples are merely illustrative and may differ from child to child depending upon the family circumstances.

Life is a collection of past experiences: if the childhood experiences are bitter, the child will carry bitterness inside. This will be demonstrated in  his behaviour. The child is likely to be devoid of human values and no amount of bookish teaching of morals and values shall work when real life experiences, deeply rooted in the sub-conscious mind tell a different  story.

Circumstances may compel parents to treat a child differently, unknowingly not allowing a child to “enjoy the precious gift of life” atleast during the early childhood. But then as adults, we only have to find a solution to the problem that we have allowed ourselves.

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The author is a multi-talented person. His  interests include Education, Psychology, Astrology & Gardening. He has a doctorate in Inorganic Chemistry, is a retired Air force Officer , a Psychologist and is currently employed as a school Prinicpal.  Most importantly he is my Dad!